Friday, December 25, 2009

Its a Wonderful Life to Die Harder!

I like to watch the Frank Capra holiday classic "It's a Wonderful Life" on Christmas Eve. I like it up to the part where that dotty old Uncle Billy brags to Old Man Potter about his nephew Harry saving a transport full of soldiers in the Pacific and being awarded the Silver Star for heroism and inadvertently drops the days receipts from the building and loan into Potters lap. Uncle Billy just deposits 8 grand into the richest man in the towns lap unknowingly and then goes about his business in the bank. Both men don't know what happened until the old coot Uncle Billy tries to deposit an empty envelope and the teller informs him of the missing dough. Then Old Man Potter opens his newspaper, and WAALAA! he's just found $8,000.00 in the sports section! Damn fine way to start Christmas Eve!
The thing that gets me pissed off about this part of the movie is that there's no retribution for Potter. All this crap happens to George Bailey, losing the money, the bank examiner being there, the authorities coming to the Bailey household with a warrant to take George to jail, George trying to commit suicide but being saved by an inept angel, and then seeing what the world would look like if he was never born because Potter never says, "oh hey Bill, you dropped your money in my wheelchair!". He lets this play out and bad stuff happens. Oh sure, all the lovely people in town bail out George and Clarence gets his wings, but Potter gets off scott-free. I think we need to inject Bruce Willis into a remake. After Clarence gets his wings, he should drop a note with George Bailey that Potter had the money all along. Then George and Bert the cop, and maybe Ernie the cab driver,
(cause he looks nuts) can get themselves some shotguns and dynamite and get over to Potters. First they take out that Lurch like man-servant that protects Potter. Then they can shoot up his house like Rambo did to that police station. Then once Potter is inside cowering and crying for mercy, they can strap dynamite to his wheelchair and blow the crap outta him.
Then all will be set straight in Bedford-Falls.
Merry Christmas

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

I Know My Stuff, I Really Do!

Why is it when I try to describe what I do to others it sounds stupid. It sounds like I don't know what I'm doing! They sit and stare at me with this look on their face like "Huh??". I tell them its my job to produce the content on the website and over see the production of all recorded products associated with the programs. Additionally I produce programs for outside clients for their CLE needs and post them online and host them. Huh??
Then we get clients who want us to do for them what we do for ourselves. Management tells me, "Go ahead Chuck, tell them what you do.." So I start to explain about the two separate workflows that exist. The live , on-site audience that needs all of the presentation equipment and the sound re-enforcement for them to hear and see the conference, and the live webcast audience that needs to get the conference delivered to their PC's and all the equipment associated with that. Huh??
Am I making sense or do I just not communicate well any longer? I wonder sometimes.

Monday, November 09, 2009

The Inbox

I get email at work and I read it, (sometimes) and then I have to do something with it. I hate to have it sit there in my inbox. I don't know. It must be some sort of compulsion with me. I like a clean inbox. I have to move the read email somewhere. Delete it. Reply to it Act on it Print it then delete it. It must never sit in my inbox or else it tortures me. Sometimes, if it must sit there, I FLAG it! Then I know I have to go back and either move it, reply to it, delete it print it or do something to it. And then there's the Blackberry inbox. That's a mess all ti itself. I'm constantly deleting that thing no matter if I read it or not! I really don't like email. It is a messy thing.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Halloween Stinks

I hate Halloween. I despise adults who get excited about "what they are going to wear" for the day. Halloween is for little kids who go trick or treating for candy. It's not a day for grown men to act out their transvestite fantasies in public or couples who don their B&D gear for everyone to see. I think its a bizarre display of exhibitionism. Quite frankly, it's disturbing to me to see my 40 something year old neighbor in her daughters cheerleader outfit. Deep down I know she wishes she was that little kid again and perversely she is soooo enjoying the Halloween moment in front of us all. Yuck! Please people. Keep all your costumes locked up in your closets and just wear them for your spouses and loved ones who care for you. I hate to tell you this. You are annoying and you don't look as good as you think you do. Now get away from my door step or I'll have to get my peace-maker and blast your ass!

Thursday, October 08, 2009

Being Martha or Being Mary

I assume if you've attended church you might have heard this one before, but I think its important. I read the Bible in the morning. It helps me focus and gets my mind centered on life's priorities. I read the passage in Luke where Jesus was visiting a house and the two sisters, Martha and Mary were there. Martha was running around making dinner and tending to all the details for the guests, but Mary was just chilling listening to Jesus and enjoying his company. Martha was getting pissed because she was doing all this work and Mary wasn't doing crap and she said to Jesus, " Hey Jesus, do you think its fair that I'm running around doing everything and Mary is sitting there doing nothing?" Jesus turned to her and said, "Don't sweat the details Martha. Whatever will be, will be. Mary knows I won't be here forever and she's enjoying the time she has with me. You should chill too." Jesus is cool in my book. I don't think he was trying to put Martha down, but she has to know when to stop and enjoy life. Too often we get caught up in the details. We need to slow down and enjoy what life has for us, what God has given us and don't be in such a hurry to always do the work that we think has to be done or take care of the silly details. I think we should pay attention to the little things and enjoy them. The laundry and the garbage and the painting and the vacuuming can all wait. Be with your loved ones.

Friday, October 02, 2009

Furniture Shopping Continued

Cathy and I finally pulled the trigger on some furniture. A leather couch, loveseat and chair for the room from Thomasville. See pics at this website I guess we can finally sit in our family room. Too bad that there's no money left to get a TV! Damn furniture! What good is a family room without a TV! What are we gonna do? Sit back there and read? Play the fiddle and square dance like we are Ma an Pa, Half-Pint and Mary in the Little House on the Prairie? Damn Damn Damn! I need to watch some football games in my room. I'm pissed.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Furniture Shopping

I had a family room built (as you know if you have followed my blog-see pics in previous posts). It has been completed since about April or May. It stands empty. Why you ask? Because we need to go furniture shopping. We need to allocate funds for shopping and we need to come up with a floor plan for the furniture. These are all very hard things to accomplish apparently. Whatever happened to the good old days when you went out, looked at one store and bought a living room set for $900.00? Now everything is super expen$ive and the sales people are all interior designers, (how'd that happen?) who want to come to your house to see your floor plan and match your other peices. Huh? Everything is an "accessory" or an "investment". I just want a place to sit and watch the game. When did this becoame so hard. I feel like furniture shopping has become the new car shopping. It has that greasy feeling to it and it makes me sweat when I hear the financing terms. As a matter of fact, I think this next set of furniture will be as much as I paid for my first new car! Crazy stuff.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

I'm Done with the Bus Observations

No more about the bus...for now. Right now I want to talk about Facebook. I think I have to stop being on Facebook for awhile. I decided Facebook is narcissism. I'm starting to feel too self absorbed there. It's all about me and whats going on with me and here's some pictures of me doing stuff. Why do I think anybody gives a crap? My life is pretty damn boring as it is. Why would I want to bore others with this stuff anyway? It would only be interesting if I did interesting stuff! Maybe I should wait to post that stuff instead of camping pictures and land of make believe photos. I'm falling asleep thinking about it. Now If me and the wife vacationed at a nudist resort, that would be an interesting post. And quite narcissistic!
Anyway I'm going to take a FB break. I am digging this Twitter thing though where you can share music and comment on it. I've been posting that to my FB page, but nobody either sees it or wants to comment on it. I am going try that for awhile and see if I can get a buzz on that. Maybe I can link it to this blog? hmmmmmm am I being narcissistic?

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Bus Stories: Chapter Three

Another interesting character is a man I liked to call "brief case seat man". I called him this because he seemed to revel in the times when the bus was full and was standing only. He would hop gaily upon the bus chuckling slyly to himself then walk down the aisle. Once he found himself an open spot, he would place his briefcase down and take out some sort of home made plank and wedge it into the briefcase. This would then act as a seat that would run across the brief case that he could sit on. He would happily plop himself down on that and smile as if he had just found money. Then he would take out of an expandable side pocket on the brief case a portable coffee mug that was wrapped in electrical tape and sip at it until we arrived into the city. I suppose the electrical tape gave it some extra thermal capabilities? He was quite an intriguing passenger on the old 165.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Bus Stories: Chapter Two

Today I want to tell you about the Philipino lady that runs to the line no matter if there is a bus there or not. She is obsessed with beating you to the line and getting in front of you no matter what. You can be walking down the ramp to the bus line and all of a sudden a whooshing sound will go by you and a streak of black hair and white sneakers is all you can see as this crazy woman speeds past you to get one spot in fron of you in line. One day I saw her coming and started jogging. She started sprinting harder. I picked up speed and she started coming at me harder. I started running and before you knew it we were in a foor race. I had to start sprinting, but I beat her to the line. When I got there I put up my arms like a champion. She gave me a dirty look that seemed to say, I will get you again one day. What a lunatic!
The greatest sub down the shore Jersey Mikes on Twitpic

Monday, August 17, 2009

Bus Stories: Chapter One

The Parkway 165 is its own little world. There are people who take the train to Manhattan, then there are those of us who ride the bus to The City. We get on at our frigid or steaming or wet stops and smash ourselves into the 49 seats inside the atmosphere that is controlled by the driver. By sheer luck each day the pleasantness of your ride is determined by the hygiene and habits of your seatmates. Yes the bus is a different world from the train. Characters abound inside that tube of steel and padded foam seats. In the next few entries I will attempt to convey to you, the reader, the unique experiences bus riders endure when commuting to the Port Authority Bus Terminal in New York City.
In order to give you an idea of the passenger that rides the bus, my wife once had the occasion to pick me up. Her car was facing the bus door as the passengers unloaded and she viewed each person as they dis-embarked from the bus. As I got to the car she was inside laughing hysterically. When I asked her what was so funny she said that she was struck funny because every person that came off the bus was funny looking or ugly. One after the other, the bus unloaded a carnival like freak show in front of her and it just struck her as funny.
She isn't exaggerating. I will start with the 5 foot tall man that sits on the bus each day and cowers whenever anybody sneezes, coughs or sniffles. This man looks as if he should have retired years ago. His portly self is squeezed into ill fitting, rather drab and dirty looking suits. He reads the free newspapers that are given out on the streets and generally looks as if he has sucked lemons all day. He has a nasty habit of digging in his ears with his pinkie fingers and pulling out gobs of sticky earwax. He then will proceed to wife it on the upholstery of the seat in front of him. This is a disgusting site that makes my stomach turn. People have audibly groaned when he does it, but he ignores them. He is a disgusting troll like being.

Friday, April 24, 2009

My Wife and her Butchered Sayings

My wife has a knack for butchering famous sayings and phrases. Some of my favorites I will list below so everyone can enjoy them. The funny part is that I understand what she means when she says them!

1. "We will burn that bridge when we get to it" rather than Don't burn your bridges before you cross them.
2. "You get my goat going" rather than You get my goat!
3. "1 dozen of one and a half of another" rather than 6 of one and a half-dozen of another.
4. "Let the cat out of the beans" rather than let the cat out of the bag.

These are the interesting malapropisms of my wife.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Closing in on the end

We are ending the final phase of the construction. It took longer than expected due to a brutally cold and snowy winter. The house was especially cold this year because it was open to the weather in spots where windows were missing, and pieces of the house were missing! I suffered in there this year. Usually its very cozy, but this winter was cold, damp and just awful. We spent the better part of the winter in the warmest part of the house...the basement. That's where we put the TV and the couch and that's the only place that there were no holes open to the outside. Well that is now behind us and the house is shaping up. What's left is painting and getting the outside back into shape. By the summer, it will all be a distant memory. I am actually looking forward to next winter when I can fire up my new fireplace and warm my old bones next to it. Hopefully we will have fond memories in the newly constructed family room.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Closing In on Construction

Its getting closer now. We are framed. The windows are scheduled to be delivered tomorrow. (If they are installed, thats to be determined). Inspections on framing and rough electrical on Wednesday, then insulation and sheetrock. After that, spackle, floor, paint trim and wah-lah! We are done! Keep your fingers crossed.